angelbabyspice:

angelbabyspice:

speaking of military i had a couple come up to my job to buy tickets to the gallery and we were all sold out and the guy says “I’m military! don’t you think there’s anything you can do?” and his wife continues, “Yes! he’s active military!” and it took Everything In My Body to not burst out laughing as I repeated that we were sold out

white americans: can we get two tickets

me: we’re sold out

white americans: but i willingly participate in the destruction of other countries in the name of imperialism!!!! don’t ya think you can put your job on the line to let me in this sold out show for free?? :D

me:

worldsworstfather:

adult person: life gets faster as you get older!

me aged 10: sounds fake but ok

me now:

gunsandfireandshit:

casbean:

harryngtonewithyourshit:

beardedchrisevans:

Is Chris Evans Steve Rogers or is Steve Rogers Chris Evans?

good

“Fellas, is it gay to be a good father?”

chlobat:

tarasmaclay:

dark hozier take me to hell

Chaotic neutral hozier take me to lunch

worldsworstfather:

anyway you should cherish ur weird friends

nyanguard-party:

fer8girl:

goddamnshinyrock:

v-diggety:

did U GUYS KNOW, that the way stores get the balloons off of the ceiling is with ANOTHER balloon, w tape on the top??? and they just dont cut the string so it’s like super long and u gotta aim it right n reel it in. i just found that out today when i DID IT and it’s been the best working day of my life i had a blast blowing up balloons and fetching some off the ceiling. i had so much power? and NO ONE ELSE in my department likes that job so now it’s MY job when need be

omg so I work at a museum and one of our buildings has a) very high ceilings and b) a bizarrely sensitive alarm system that will go off if anything touches the ceiling. Because of this, helium balloons are considered public enemy #1 and are strictly forbidden from entering the museum. But just in case an illicit balloon is successfully smuggled in, the museum has acquired a fucking b.b. gun for the express purpose of shooting down rogue balloons.

lawful good vs chaotic good

chaotic evil

whoopace-kosi:

mydeepbluegoldentattoo:

hollyblueagate:

are those two dudes from supernatural ok? it’s been like 14 years. there’s high schoolers younger than their contract. i don’t think i’ve ever seen them in any other shows. are they allowed to leave? do they feed them?

when supernatural began airing:

tumblr wouldnt exist for another two years

bush was still president

lost hadn’t aired its second season yet

youtube wasnt even a year old

the #1 song was kanye west - gold digger

ariana grande was 12

taylor swift wasn’t famous yet

paris hilton was at the height of her fame, kim k was not famous yet

jesus christ